Simplicity!

We went to church today at Longstreet Methodist church.  It was homecoming.  It has really become an annual tradition for us. Sometimes we just go for lunch.  Sometimes, like today,  we get there in time for singing and the morning message.  To some, it may seem odd for us to go to homecoming at a church that we can't really call home.  Neither Deb nor I ever attended there regularly.  In fact, about the only time we have ever been there is for homecoming and other special occasions.  We go there because it is a place that is so special to many of our friends that mean a lot to us.  Friends that we truly love.

It is a 202 year old structure that has been added onto only once, as far as I can tell.  The two front doors are original to the structure.  They are kind of rough hewn.  The nails were probably handmade and the hinges certainly were.  It is a simple structure that was built back in the days when construction in the south, at least this part of the south, was really simple.  Life itself was simpler in those days too.

   

Danny Mathis was today's speaker.  It is not his "home" church either, but he spoke about how he spent a lot of time there as a young man in the seventies and how he got his bearings as a young Christian there.

Danny used this setting to talk about the simplicity of salvation. How easy it is to make our relationship with God overly complex. 

Of course, that is all true, but don't we sometimes,  (maybe most of the time,)  make our life, especially our relationships overly complex?  It is so easy to expect more of people that they can deliver.  It is also easy to put OUR expectations on other people; expectations that are our goals for them, and not theirs.  We do it to our friends.  We do it to our parents.  We do it to our children.  (Sometime we even do it to people beside us or in front of us in traffic.) We are responsible for our own disappointment in others because we EXPECT them to be what we want them to be, rather than what they are meant to be.

Danny talked about clutter.  I am sure he was mostly referring to clutter in our spiritual lives, but it could also apply to other clutter in our lives, our homes, our cars, and our minds.  I certainly am guilty of having so many thing on my mental list of "to dos" that I get so bogged down that I don't get any of it, or at least not much of it done.  He had a solution: simplify!  In fact he used the KISS phrase: "Keep it Simple Stupid."

I couldn't help but think about my dear bride, Deb.  Several years ago when she was thinking about retirement, she decided that she (we) had too much clutter in our lives.  She vowed to "Simplify" her, which really meant our, lives.  She has been on this quest for several years and even though I am a slow learner, I am beginning to get it.  (In some areas of my life, I am practically rehab slow...) 

In some areas of my life, I am so organized.  In other  (most) areas I am so cluttered and I really need to work on those areas.  I have a good friend who collects and saves.  He sometimes says that he is just a bag or two (of junk) short of being featured on "Hoarders."   He say things like, "...because one day I might really need those headlight rings for a 1964 Nash Rambler.  Who knows!"

I laugh when he says these things, but even though I may not collect car parts, there is so much clutter in my life.  I have books that I will never refer to or read again.  I have tools that I will probably never use.  I know that I have old salvage wood that will never find its way into a project.  But that is not all, I have attitudes that need to go.  I have expectations that I need to get rid of.  Fears? Prejudices?  Who know what else?

Lastly, I will mention one final point on simplicity.  Knowing that we were going to eat after Danny spoke and knowing that Danny was the guest speaker, some woman, (I didn't hear her name,) made Danny a German chocolate cake.  That is his favorite!  If you have slowed down enough to think about your friend's favorite cake and actually have the time to make it for him, you have pretty much mastered the simplicity sermon...

Thanksgiving wishes

From Veteran’s Day until sometime in January when sheets and towels go on sale, life is really a blur at the Davis house. Probably yours too! Between dealing with leaves on the ground, decorating, shopping for gifts for your friends and loved ones, practicing for Christmas plays, Thanksgiving, office luncheons, church dinners and parties, and POSSIBLY watching just part of a football game or two, there doesn’t seem to be enough time to stop and smell the pumpkin pie.

In the middle of this blur, I think that it is important for us to stop and take a few minutes to think about what and who is important to us. Even more important, take the time to tell those special people that they important to you and how you appreciate them. Sending flowers after they’re gone will not be enough, trust me. It is much better to tell them while you are both living.

A friend once told me about a long-time friend of hers who had lost her husband. She took it very hard. It was almost a year before the two friends were able to talk about the loss. My friend asked, “What was the hardest part of losing your husband unexpectedly?”

She replied, “What I regret the most is the fact that the last time I saw him was when he left for work that morning he died, I was in such a hurry that I did not tell him I loved him. We always said ‘I love you’ each morning before he left. But that morning we were just too busy. I would give anything to be able to tell him that I love him, just one more time.”

Well, chances are that you will be around the very people that mean the most to you in the next few days. My challenge to you is to take just a few minutes to chat with each one and tell them how they are special to you. And if you love them, tell them! If they are not where you are, PICK UP THE PHONE!

Life expectancy is the longest it has ever been. But life is still too short to not take the time to smell the pumpkin pie, and laugh with family, and let them know what they mean to you. Besides, it’s Thanksgiving.

Coupons

On a Saturday night a couple of years ago, my family and I went to a ball game in Macon, so I was out much later that usual. I had to get gas before coming home so I stopped by one of the fine convenience stores near downtown. I had just gotten out of my Jeep and this sad looking guy approached me before I could get the door opened to my gas tank.

“Panhandler,” I thought. “This is why I hate to be near downtown Macon at night.”

“Can you spare something so I can get something to eat? All I have is this penny that I just found.” He insisted on showing it to me.

“Let me get the gas going and I’ll check,” I said.

You know that I cannot pass one of those red kettles at Christmas, but this is different. I know that the kettle is legitimate. You just don’t know about these guys; dirty clothes, matted hair, ugly scars, smelly. Will they actually eat? Will they dull their cravings for drugs or alcohol? What do you do?

I remember the first guy like this I ever saw standing at a traffic light on an off-ramp in Atlanta. He had a sign that said something like, “will work for food.” It disturbed me deeply, but I was in the wrong lane and didn’t stop. When I got to my friend’s business, I told him about it.

He said, “Oh yeah, he’s been there over a month. I stopped and offered him a job the first morning I saw him. He declined. I stop about once a week and offer him a job or a trip to a nearby Waffle House for breakfast. He must be making pretty good money. He only works during morning rush hour as people come to work. I figure he’ll be gone when his donations drop off.”

I had no idea.

I am somewhere between a cynic and an old-fashioned softie. I don’t have a problem putting dollars into the big guitar at the Mexican restaurant for the mariachi to play “Besame Mucho” or “Rancho Grande’,” but that is different. I know that the Mariachi members are professionals that depend on tips to make a living. I don’t know if these guys are professionals or just victims of bad luck (or bad choices.)

I finally got the pump started and fumbled through my pockets to see if I had a couple of ones to give him. I could only find one. I was not about to reach for my wallet, certainly not late at night in downtown Macon, Georgia. I did find several coupons that had been handed out at the ball game: some from Chick-Fil-A and a couple for a free Big Mac. I gave him one of each and a dollar for a drink. He smiled, said thanks and almost broke out in a trot toward McDonalds.

I didn’t stand there and watch to see if he actually went in. That would probably have been rude, distrustful, or even prying. Did he turn away before he made it to the golden arches? Did he go to sleep with cheese on his breath, or something stronger? Did I do the right thing? I don’t know the answer to any of these. Would I do it again? Yes, I would, and I am now saving my coupons. I never know when I might need one or two.

Election Day

I don’t know about you, but there is a sense of relief at my house that today is voting day. We have had several pounds of unsolicited (and unwanted) “fact sheets” about the opponents of everyone running in today’s election and several of the issues that will be on the ballot. We have had robocalls from all persuasions. For the first time in my life, we have “Important,” or something similar, has shown up on my caller ID as much as “unavailable.” Between the mail, the phone calls, radio, television, and strange people waving signs beside the road, it is really hard to not be not only tired, but completely cynical about what the election process has become in America.

This morning, a friend and coworker came by the office to drop off and pick up some papers. She is off work today, but she and her husband were on their way to vote. They were both excited. They were taking their small children with them to witness the voting process. They even wondered if they could TAKE PICTURES!

I felt a little guilty.

You see, it is the first time that they have ever voted in a general election. They just got their U.S. Citizenship in December of 2009. They came to America from Eastern Europe several years ago with a temporary work visa. They vividly remember life under Soviet rule. Even their names were selected by their parents from a book of approved “non-Christian” names. She has told me what her parents wanted to name her, but that name was rejected by the authorities, probably because it was “too Christian.” They came here, settled here, worked here, furthered their education here, found a church here, and they have contributed here. Today they will exercise a right afforded every American, the right to vote.

It is really easy to become angry, disappointed, or frustrated with the political process we have here. Sometimes it is easy to say, “They’re all idiots! I’m not voting for any of them. Why can’t we vote, ‘none of the above?’ ”

As brilliant as they were, our founding fathers understood that they would not get everything just right. Not only did they make provisions to amend our Constitution, in the preamble to that document they spoke not about perfection, but striving for it.

“We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.”

In order to form a more perfect Union….. We aren’t there yet. We do dumb things. We have made many corrections in our 200+ years of existence. We have elected brilliant men who could not lead. We have elected some really flawed men who have become surprisingly good leaders.

When the results of today’s voting are tallied, it will neither fix all our flaws nor condemn us to destruction. We will have elected some frogs and probably have sent a prince or two home. Hopefully, it will bring us closer to that, “more perfect Union” that our forefathers envisioned.

I am proud to have the opportunity to vote, even if I think that the choices aren’t that good. The new citizens that voted their first time today is proof that we are doing something right. I am proud for them, but I am also proud of them.

Good Intentions........revisited

(August 2007)
Good intentions are pretty much worthless. Maybe I should clarify that. Good intentions without action are pretty much worthless. I have believed that for a long time, but I continue to prove it to myself.

Just a few miles north of Cochran, right on my way to work, someone planted several acres of sunflowers last year. That is not that uncommon in these parts, but they were just beautiful. They were planted in two plots on a southeastern facing slope and it was very picturesque. The blooms faced me each morning as I drove to work and seemed to look the other way when I returned home hot and tired (me, not them.)

They hit their prime about the week of July 4th. I fully intended to stop and take pictures one morning on the way to work, but I kept forgetting my camera. The morning that I finally remembered to bring it, I stopped and got out only to discover that the batteries were dead. When I finally got back with fresh batteries the following Saturday, it was too late. It was just another South Georgia field, drying up in another sweltering summer.

I had good intentions, but the results were no different than if had had no intentions at all.

I have reached the age that requires one to go to a lot of retirements and funerals. I thought of this story recently at an old friend’s retirement luncheon. He and I processed on base together as new federal employees on a nice Tuesday in 1973. On that day, he had been a father for two days and I didn’t have a clue what I wanted to do with my life. 34+ years later, I still wonder what I need to do next. I have several years’ worth of things that I want to do “someday” but struggle with what I need to do today and tomorrow.

I have always admired men from America’s early history who seemed to be able to accomplish so much without the modern conveniences we have today. A couple of weeks ago, a friend asked me if I’d been having trouble with my computer. What she meant was that I hadn’t been using it, at least how she thought I should.

When our children were small and we got our first VCR, they couldn’t understand why they couldn’t watch their favorite program any time they wanted. It is probably a harder lesson to learn for children today. They watch movies in the back seat while they are on their way to church. I guess I never really got the fact that some things need to be done now and other things can be done at any time.

Somehow, I end up doing stuff that is convenient and not doing the important stuff. My actions don’t match my intentions. Sometimes I don’t save time to do those things that I need to do for myself, my friends or my family. My backlog of neglect is pretty extensive. I am even several years behind on my New Years resolutions.

Our intentions are important, but good intentions are not enough. Doing the right thing, but not doing it at the right time is not really doing the right thing. Just like that field of flowers that I failed to “picture”, other opportunities to fulfill our intentions will pass their prime and eventually go away. I’m reminded of this every day when I pass that field on my way to work. The picture that I failed to take probably looks better in my memory that it ever would have printed and framed. That’s OK. Maybe I won’t miss the next one. Maybe you won’t either.

Epilogue
I wrote that three years ago, almost to the day. The owner of that field finally planted sunflowers again this year. I almost waited too late again. The week of July 4th, I finally stopped and took a couple of pictures. The field was not as full as it was the year I missed. I don't think that they were as pretty as before either. But you don't get that many second chances.

Just a few days later, a small ad was in the local shoppers guide inviting people to come see sunflowers just north of town. I thought, "a third chance? I can't miss this." So I got my camera and went to see.
Of course, it was the wrong time of day, the lighting was not right, and I should have gone a week earlier. I am so glad that I got a second, AND third chance.

I hope that this experience prods me to do a much better job of doing the right things at the right time. I know that I can't always expect multiple chances to get things right.

What do you think?