A few weeks ago, the leader of our church’s senior adult group, “Senior Friends” asked me about helping with a hayride for the group. He said, “My wife told me to ask for your help because if you helped, it would be fun; if I planned it by myself, it would be boring.”
I suspect that she may have suggested that he ask for my help, but I really doubt that she said anything about him planning a boring trip without me. He is a retiree who rides a motorcycle, for heaven’s sake. How could he be boring?
In any case, I gave him my thoughts and told him that I hoped they had a good time; I wouldn’t be there for it though.
The weekend before the hayride, he again asked me a few questions. I answered as best I could, but again wished him well and told him that I couldn’t (wouldn’t) be there.
A couple of days before the event, my wife casually mentioned that she had signed us up to bring soup to the “after the hayride” festivities. You could have heard a hay bale drop…… “Honey, didn’t I mention that I couldn’t be there?”
Well, as you can imagine, the night of the event was a beautiful, full moon-lit night, with temperatures hovering around a crisp 32° F. That’s cold enough that those who were actually crazy enough to get on the trailer wouldn’t admit to having been there.
They had borrowed a nice trailer from “Gully Branch” that was actually built for that purpose. It had a nice John Deere paint scheme and plenty of bench seating. It was even equipped with a slide out, walker-wide ramp so that the infirm (both of mind and body) could get on and off.
The way I heard it, the ride started with a bang. The driver pulled out with a trailer full of seniors, wrapped up in light jackets and a smattering of gloves, hats and blankets.
Living in the Deep South, I am not all that familiar with, nor have I ever had the need to understand, a wind chill chart. As best I can tell, with an ambient temperature of 32°F and a truck pulling a trailer at 35 MPH, frostbite is not a serious threat, but you would have a hard time convincing about 30 of my senior friends that it was not possible.
“Hey, Hey, Hey, Are you late for some appointment somewhere?” they shouted.
When the driver finally stopped, he asked, “Are you cold back there? I was only going 30-35!”
“We could fly a kite back here, if the wind-chill didn’t freeze and break the string!”
A whole nest of Grannies were all wrapped up in one blanket, shaking their heads.
After that, he held the speed down to 18-20, so the wind chill was only about 20°F. This made the next 100 yards, or so, NOT TOO BAD.
One couple was completely under their own blanket by the time they got to the next stop sign.
“What are you doing under that blanket, David?”
“Leave me alone, I’m smooching with my wife.”
“David, are you sure that that is Jan under there with you?”
“It’s too cold to come out and check, right now.”
By the time they got to the next stop sign, riders were saying, “Great, we can turn around here, and maybe we won’t all have pneumonia.”
It didn’t happen.
By this time, several folks were beginning to express concern that the driver and his wife were really missing all the fun that was happening on the trailer. At least 10 men volunteered to drive so that the driver and his wife could ride in the back where the “fun” was.
“This whole trip was their idea and they are missing all the fun.”
Really, this was a trailer full of caring, selfless people. (If I had been there, I might have cried.)
When a car pulled up behind the trailer, someone said, “Don’t look right at them. They might recognize us. We don’t want them to think that our church if full of idiots that would be out on a hayride on a night like tonight.”
Indeed.
They made it a full six miles before the threat of violence appeared, “turn around, get us back to the church and get us hot chocolate and no one gets hurt…”
Even though they were headed back, several were still not convinced that the driver was not lost. “Is he still looking for a place to turn around?”
“These are my best gloves and I still can’t feel my fingers.”
“Don’t touch my ears, they might fall off.”
And my personal favorite, “I can’t tell, is my nose running?”
This was an over 50 crowd, a group that, as a whole, is technology averse. I suspect that they will all have a better understanding of weather forecasting and wind chill before they get on a “Gully Branch” trailer at night again. The way I heard it, there were more than 30 “Senior Friends” out that night, but none would admit to actually being on that hay ride. I know that if I had been there, I probably wouldn’t admit it either.
Showing posts with label Winter. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Winter. Show all posts
Monday, November 28, 2011
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Winter Funk
For those of you that I haven’t communicated with since last year, I wish a belated Happy New Year to you all! I hope that you had a fine time during the holidays and was able to spend some time with those you love. Now it is time to hang that new calendar and drag out that list of stuff that you were planning to get to “next year.” As I have said recently, I was not built for cold weather. It has been an ugly couple of weeks on Chicken Road. This past weekend was much better, but yesterday and today is more like a beautiful spring day in Moscow than Late January or early February in South Georgia.
The holiday season can be a hard time for some people. With all the emphasis on family togetherness, the holidays can remind many of the loved ones and friends who are no longer with them. Other people make it through the holidays just fine, but have a post holiday letdown. Short days, no big gatherings to look forward to, back to work, and lastly those holiday bills begin pouring in. YUCK! We all develop our personal ways of dealing with these winter blahs. I have found that post-holiday mail can actually HELP. I’m not talking about those nice letters from “Publisher’s Clearinghouse”. I’m talking catalogs! Although the internet has certainly reduced the demand for them, Catalogs, especially seed catalogs, can brighten up a pretty dreary existence. The most memorable one came about ten years ago. Although it was not about seeds, it just brightened my day. Actually, it brightened several days and nights. (I don’t know what happened to these people since this was the only one I ever received from them.) It was so good that I made notes:
It featured a nice lamp with a river birch bark shade. Not just ANY river birch bark, but “bark that has fallen naturally onto the forest floor.” I can’t remember the price, but the description made you think that it just might be a bargain! (and you were removing the birch bark litter from the forest floor too!)
I have a couple of other examples that are quotable:
“Smooth river stones, wrapped by Philippine artisan with tilot vine to create a marvelous contrast of color and texture. (stones are approximately 2-3”) set of 10 wrapped stones $55.” (I’ve looked it up. I still don’t know what “tilot vine” looks like. My computer just thinks it’s a misspelled word. Google couldn’t find it either, but suggested “toilet wine.” I was not brave enough to click on that!)
“ETERNAL BIRDS NEST: Chunks of concrete and rusted wire retrieved from demolition rubble are recreated into an endearing little nest to cradle small smooth egg shaped stones plucked from a river bed...........each will vary slightly. Approximately 6” high. $79.”
And my favorite:
“FLYING FISH PIN: Cleverly assembled from recycled parts of vintage watches, this winged fish dangles a plump heart charm, handmade of brass by a Florida jeweler with a sense of humor; $39” (If they just had it in a tie tack.)
How could anyone read that and not smile just a little, especially knowing the writer is serious and in most cases, show you a picture of the product.
Put another log on the fire and pass me another catalog. I think that I’ll whip this winter funk yet!
The holiday season can be a hard time for some people. With all the emphasis on family togetherness, the holidays can remind many of the loved ones and friends who are no longer with them. Other people make it through the holidays just fine, but have a post holiday letdown. Short days, no big gatherings to look forward to, back to work, and lastly those holiday bills begin pouring in. YUCK! We all develop our personal ways of dealing with these winter blahs. I have found that post-holiday mail can actually HELP. I’m not talking about those nice letters from “Publisher’s Clearinghouse”. I’m talking catalogs! Although the internet has certainly reduced the demand for them, Catalogs, especially seed catalogs, can brighten up a pretty dreary existence. The most memorable one came about ten years ago. Although it was not about seeds, it just brightened my day. Actually, it brightened several days and nights. (I don’t know what happened to these people since this was the only one I ever received from them.) It was so good that I made notes:
It featured a nice lamp with a river birch bark shade. Not just ANY river birch bark, but “bark that has fallen naturally onto the forest floor.” I can’t remember the price, but the description made you think that it just might be a bargain! (and you were removing the birch bark litter from the forest floor too!)
I have a couple of other examples that are quotable:
“Smooth river stones, wrapped by Philippine artisan with tilot vine to create a marvelous contrast of color and texture. (stones are approximately 2-3”) set of 10 wrapped stones $55.” (I’ve looked it up. I still don’t know what “tilot vine” looks like. My computer just thinks it’s a misspelled word. Google couldn’t find it either, but suggested “toilet wine.” I was not brave enough to click on that!)
“ETERNAL BIRDS NEST: Chunks of concrete and rusted wire retrieved from demolition rubble are recreated into an endearing little nest to cradle small smooth egg shaped stones plucked from a river bed...........each will vary slightly. Approximately 6” high. $79.”
And my favorite:
“FLYING FISH PIN: Cleverly assembled from recycled parts of vintage watches, this winged fish dangles a plump heart charm, handmade of brass by a Florida jeweler with a sense of humor; $39” (If they just had it in a tie tack.)
How could anyone read that and not smile just a little, especially knowing the writer is serious and in most cases, show you a picture of the product.
Put another log on the fire and pass me another catalog. I think that I’ll whip this winter funk yet!
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Ice and snow in the South
Well, the snow and ice has finally melted in middle Georgia. In shaded areas, it held on for more than a week. That must be some kind of record for this part of the world. We had way too many consecutive days with lows in the teens and twenties. I have said it a thousand times, if I really wanted to live like that, I could have moved to Ohio thirty years ago when someone else would have paid for it.
My wife’s Aunt Lee, who lived in Goldsboro, NC most of her life, would stop the newspaper, turn off the water and leave for Florida every year at the first prediction of frost. She wouldn’t come back until Easter. I always loved her for that because I could identify with that. It made sense to me because I despise having to wear thermal anything!
Yesterday morning I was looking out the window, watching the birds and squirrels in the yard. I commented that the squirrels this winter were the fattest I ever remember seeing. I guess they have been just lying around in their recliners, eating nuts and watching football like the rest of us. Well, maybe not the football part, but I did get the idea that they probably had been a little lax with their physical activities and diet since Thanksgiving. OK. Maybe seeing them made me think about how lax I have been during that time period.
I am just glad that it has warmed up some. Don’t worry. I am not going to do something crazy; I just want to be able to walk around the block without being afraid I’ll slip on the ice. I don’t know what P90X means and my daughter had to explain who Jillian Michaels is. A couple of the guys from church are doing the Insanity workout video. (How crazy is that?)
You just can't believe how glad I am that the ice and snow nightmare is over. I had this recurring dream that they had moved my hometown to Ohio. As pretty as it was, I prefer to visit the snow and ice rather than it coming to me. In fact, I like snow best on Christmas cards, and on TV in fringe viewing areas.
My wife’s Aunt Lee, who lived in Goldsboro, NC most of her life, would stop the newspaper, turn off the water and leave for Florida every year at the first prediction of frost. She wouldn’t come back until Easter. I always loved her for that because I could identify with that. It made sense to me because I despise having to wear thermal anything!
Yesterday morning I was looking out the window, watching the birds and squirrels in the yard. I commented that the squirrels this winter were the fattest I ever remember seeing. I guess they have been just lying around in their recliners, eating nuts and watching football like the rest of us. Well, maybe not the football part, but I did get the idea that they probably had been a little lax with their physical activities and diet since Thanksgiving. OK. Maybe seeing them made me think about how lax I have been during that time period.
I am just glad that it has warmed up some. Don’t worry. I am not going to do something crazy; I just want to be able to walk around the block without being afraid I’ll slip on the ice. I don’t know what P90X means and my daughter had to explain who Jillian Michaels is. A couple of the guys from church are doing the Insanity workout video. (How crazy is that?)
You just can't believe how glad I am that the ice and snow nightmare is over. I had this recurring dream that they had moved my hometown to Ohio. As pretty as it was, I prefer to visit the snow and ice rather than it coming to me. In fact, I like snow best on Christmas cards, and on TV in fringe viewing areas.
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